Chasing Shadows

[alectoperdita]

Title: Chasing Shadows
Fandom: Harry Potter
Coupling: HarryxSnape
Rating: PG
Word Count: Exactly 100

Chasing Shadows

Shadows give depth, shape, and perspective.

As we ascend the rickety stairs, we pass under strips of light and shadow cast by the exposed rafters overhead.

Shadows do nothing to hide your imperfections. They do the opposite instead. They emphasize the hollowed crevices dipping the planes of your face and your all-too-sharp features.

The light softens even the harshest of men, but it lies all the same in its blinding glory.

No.

I’d much prefer you this way- shrouded in shadows.

If you won’t let me love anything else of you, at least let me love the shadows you cast.

~~~

Next: Fleeing From Shadows

I'm not really so sure where all of this came from... This is my first 100 word drabble. Please tell me what you think.

Comments

[theoctober.livejournal.com]

Very interesting, I like how you used light and dark, and how they were not as clear cut as they usually are in most stories. (IE: Light softens and glorifies, but lies.) The symbolism you used is perfect, it's not too strong, but it gets the point across. There are a few awkward sentences, but it's still a great drabble.

[alecto-chan.livejournal.com]

The light softens even the harshest of men but it lies all the same in its blinding glory.

I figure this is one of those awkward lines right? Drabbles are a lot harder to do than they appear. ^^;;;

[taligator.livejournal.com]

Very nice ...

The last line makes me feel all swoony :)

"The light softens ever the harshest .. " it's not awkward so much as realizing what you mean by the word "lie". First read through I thought you meant to lie, as in lie down on the ground .. but second through I thought you meant lie as in, not telling the truth. I think that's where the awkwardness in that sentence comes from.

Thanks!

[bluerose16.livejournal.com]

"Shadows give depth, shape, and perspective."

Alecto, I honestly cannot think of anything to say to this other than that you have mastered the technique of the powerful, addictive first line. Pure genius. It is it's simplicity which draws the reader in, makes them wonder about these shadows and their origins ... just lovely.

"As we ascend the rickety stairs, we pass under strips of light and shadow cast by the exposed rafters overhead. "

Gorgeous, vivid concrete image. I'm glad you put this in, because it serves as a sort of anchor for the rest of the story. When there is nothing *happening* in a drabble and it is all contemplation and philosiphy, there is something that is lost. This line, however, gives a setting, a definite event to which the reader can cling. Wow. And I love the comparisons of light and dark in the next two paragraphs. Stunning.

"If you won’t let me love anything else of you, at least let me love the shadows you cast."

Alecto, I honestly cannot think of anything to say to this other than that you have mastered the technique of the perfect, inexorable last line. Heart-breaking, realistic, and so beautiful that it hurts.

All in all, I'd say that this was a rather gigantic success on your part.

[theoctober.livejournal.com]

Oh I know, and you managed to convey an incredible amount of depth in 100 words. Sorry if my comment belittled that in any way, I didn't mean to. >.

[alecto-chan.livejournal.com]

Oh no, not at all. That last comment about the difficulty of drabble was solely for myself. I wasn't contradicting anything you said. Sorry if I conveyed the wrong message. ^^;;;;;;;;;

[escapisms.livejournal.com]

I like that.

If you won’t let me love anything else of you, at least let me love the shadows you cast.

Definitely my favorite line.

[xsectumsemprax.livejournal.com]

Beautiful. Short and to the point, yet intoxicating. I adored it, and I agree with bluerose, the last line is simply magnificent. *applauds*

[alecto-chan.livejournal.com]

Thank you for helping to clarify the problem with that line. I'll have to think it over to see if I really need to change it.

Thank you for reviewing!

[alecto-chan.livejournal.com]

Your reviews means a lot to me. Thank you for your CC. I actually wasn't sure if that last line would even make much sense, the at least let me love the shadows you cast.

Thanks again!

[alecto-chan.livejournal.com]

Thank you for reviewing.

[alecto-chan.livejournal.com]

Thank you. I'm really glad the last line actually worked. ^________^

Thanks for reviewing!

[bluerose16.livejournal.com]

^____^ You are, as always, more than welcome. It's my pleasure, really.

No, it made perfect sense. And it was utterly, exquisitely beautiful.

[luzkun.livejournal.com]

The imagery in this is extremely vivid. The strips of light, the exposed rafters, hollowed crevices and planes... this is poetry.

The last line is golden, by the by. :)

That's your first shot at 100 words? I'm repressing envy. ^_^